Note to Salem PD: Try taking off the door hinges

If past history is any guide, we’ll never find out why Stefano decided to trap everyone on the 7th floor of the hospital and gas them and mess with their heads.

It’s because he can.

I enjoyed this Event for the most part, though, for two reasons. One is that stories moved forward. EJ and Tony plan to challenge both John and Stefano to “take back” the DiMera name. EJ and Sami kissed, so Nicole stepped back from EJ, and Lucas decided to try for sole custody of Allie. Joe was DiMera-napped and implanted with something-or-other … and John and Marlena started to reconnect.


I’m no J&M fan, so maybe I’d see this differently if I were, but I found the whole thing heavyhanded and unmotivated to the extreme. The timing is almost an insult, since Ava just left town. The double-trouble scenes on Wednesday (8/20) were particularly annoying. Sam shows up and starts telling Marlena some home truths about how she’s let her obsession with saving John interfere with her sense of self—but then she apparently decided it was all a lost cause and told her to go for it after all.

Loved seeing these flashbacks though. Such shiny, shiny hair.

It was interesting to recognize Drake as oldJohn as soon as he appeared, with his slicked-down hair and more fluid body language. But again, the conversation left something to be desired. What oldJohn said about Marlena being the love of his life is no different than what everyone has been saying to nuJohn for months. Couldn’t they give John any particular insight into why he loooooves Marlena so much? Or how about oldJohn just showing up and beating the crap out of nuJohn? “You’re ruining my life!”

The other reason I enjoyed this event is that there were moments of character building and reflection. This was particularly interesting with Tony. His hallucination of Stefano telling him that he has no backbone, and that he’s always been a disappointment, brought out themes from twenty years ago. Tony back then was always torn between living up to his father’s expectations, or carving a life of his own apart from him. This flashback served at the perfect motivator for his proposal to EJ on Friday.

I look forward to a four-way power struggle between four very different DiMera men.

Okay, cute:

But I’d still rather have a decent storyline for Steve and Kayla.

Screencaps Days 2 and Chit Chat Haven


6 thoughts on “Note to Salem PD: Try taking off the door hinges

  1. Little Joe is adorable, I give casting credit there. But what was kidnapping him all about? If he’s been implanted with some microchip that will then turn him into a pawn when he turns 16 (next year sometime I’m sure), I will be a bit irritated.

    Couldn’t agree more on Marlena, I liked Sam’s message to her about becoming ALL ABOUT JOHN but I doubt she’ll change anything. And of course, John will want her again so we’ll get to see him pursue her. That just holds no appeal for me whatsoever. I enjoyed the flashback though, I think Andrea Hall was prettier than Dee back in the day, before years of plastic surgery of course.

    While no fan of John, I kinda enjoyed Old John’s “That’s a fact” and less robotic demeanor. If they’d combine that with NuJohn’s truth telling and lack of interest in being the town hero, we might really have something. Alas, we know it’s not to be!

  2. ITA about combining the 2 John’s. He would be close to being the perfect soap man. Everyone would want to have subsex with him!

  3. I have no idea what they put in little Joe. A homing device?

    I’d like to find some way to keep nuJohn around—they’ve already done so for much longer than I expected. I love his amorality, and cynicism, and willingness to call it like it is. It’s very refreshing. But I was surprised to find it was nice to see OldJohn again. We’ll have to see what happens. At the moment they sure are hitting us over the head with the fact that the reunion begins now.

  4. A propos the ages of the younger generation, I keep trying to do the math and nothing seems to add up. How old is Stephanie supposed to be? She was a baby when Steve “died”. So that would make her 18 or 19, right? But clearly she’s supposed to be older — she’s already had a career as a race car driver — though she often acts like a two year old. I keep telling myself to get over it, don’t let the discontinuity bug you. But it does.

  5. Stephanie is actually one of the lesser examples of crimes against continuity. She’s been aged a bit to low-20’s, it’s true, but for a soap that’s not bad. There were a bunch of babies born in the 90s that were all SORASed in the early 2000’s. Belle, Phillip, Brady, and Abby were all born in the early to mid-90’s. EJ is only supposed to be around 12, I think, and Chelsea (in addition to the problem of being a miscarried fetus) should only be about 10. Shawn D was born around 1986, Belle was born in 1995 or thereabouts, and yet they were in the same class in high school. Will should be older than Phillip. Crazy.

  6. In a weird way, this is rather reassuring. Every soap has its teen storylines. Looking at the current characters, I didn’t see where they could come from. But if we assume a super accelerated growth rate, there are possibilities. And after all, we really don’t know what Steve was doing for 16 years. He could easily have a teenager or two our there in the ether. And think of all the other characters that “died” or vanished, only to return. There could be an endless source of pubescent offspring to draw on.

    Thanks for the note about Chelsea. That was another one I was puzzled by. I kept counting backwards and thinking how could Bo have a daughter that age with Billie? He was with Hope back when she would have to have been conceived.

    By the way, who is Zach and why is he dead? And is he really dead, or might he resurface? (He would be about the right age, wouldn’t he?) This is Salem, after all. Did somebody put a stake in his heart or behead him? Could he come back, strangely changed or seeking revenge?

    You know, I’ve got to wonder why I’m watching. From a tentative toe dip just to catch up with Steve and Kayla, I can see myself getting sucked in again. But these stories! They’re so ridiculous. Why do I watch?

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